Wounded soldiers attending Wine Festival surprised to hear they’re traitors and rejects

YEREVAN, ARMENIA — The Armenian Wine Festival (one of the thousands of festivals Armenians have for each fruit, drink… basically anything edible) has stirred some drama this year, with unexpected competition from a “Let’s Whine Festival” which mainly took place on social media. Basically, people attending it have been called “traitors”, “zombies”, “Pashinyan’s rejects” by … Read more

Azerbaijan supports youth by beating and stabbing them

NANTES, FRANCE — Azerbaijan just revealed a new program to help young influencers. The program, called “We’re going to cut your tongue“, has just been launched on an experimental basis in the city of Nantes, where Mahammad Mirzali, a young Azeri blogger, had the pleasure of meeting a delegation of six representatives who came to … Read more

Australians ask to be paid to read news

SIDNEY, AUSTRALIA — While Facebook and Australian news outlets fight over the latter ones wanting the first one to pay them for posting their content themselves for free, another fight started yesterday when the readers themselves wanted to get paid too. “I mean, if the news outlets get paid for that, why not pay us … Read more

Happy New Year 1984!

Seriously, though. The whole staff wishes you a Happy New Year. This article was supposed to come out earlier, but we got a lot of setbacks, some because of us, some not (see below). So we had to postpone it a couple of times. Here it is, with A LOT of changes… Contents: delays, censorship, … Read more

Local man just decides now to open a Facebook account

LOS ANGELES, USA — Bryan just decided, on January 2021, to finally open an account on Facebook. “I can’t stop hearing about this thing”, he said. “I get it’s kind of super popular right now for some reason”, he added. “I thought it was the right time to get in.” Explaining he “had enough of … Read more

Erdogan to WhatsApp: “There’s only room for one dictator in Turkey!”

ANKARA, TURKEY — Following WhatsApp’s announcement of a new privacy policy, the Turkish government advised people to quit the messaging app. “No way we’ll let foreigners spy on our people,” President Erdogan said. “We’re already here for that!” “We must fight against digital fascism”, he added, “which threatens our good old local fascism”. “There’s only … Read more