Azerbaijan wants peace for Israel and Palestine to keep on buying weapons while still acting Muslims

BAKU, AZERBAIDJAN — Forced to self-censor over their continued purchase of weapons from Israel, the presidential palace of President for life Ilham Aliyev has expressed a desire for peace in the Middle East.

Asked about the consistency between his positions of support for the Palestinians and his arms contracts with those who are accused of oppressing these same Palestinians, President Aliyev, a big fan of kosher drones, said he had enough of “old clichés”.

“Yes, you can be Muslim and prostitute yourself to Israel,” he reportedly added.

“Imagine if Muslims learned that I give more money to Israel with one contract than total aid to the Palestinians in 20 years.”, he told journalists before going on crying about Islamophobia in the world .

At publishing time, Turkish President Erdogan congratulated his counterpart, reminding everyone that he was the first to support the Uyghurs while signing contracts with China.